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Monday, January 4, 2010

My MBTI Personality test! (Cont'd)

(I have sent this article to Socionics today. They have to vet before they release it.)

I have been an ENFJ(2007), ESFJ(2008) and ESFP(2009 to now). My take is that personalities do change (maybe due to environment or even hormones).

I will be talking about myself as ESFP woman but I did not study much about this personality type.

I relate well to people but always keep my innermost feelings to myself. I blog privately. But I always go with my gut feelings. I have always wanted myself to be a leader and to see the overview of things, that was why all along my personality was ENFJ.

Recently I decided I do not want to along with what my friends or family are asking of me (This may be the mid-life crisis? I am 32 this July.) I retailiated by not taking on a regular job. Everyone was shocked and could not understand. It could be because I have never shared my real feelings/perceptions with people and always 'agreed' with them.

I feel ESFP are strong people but will do things that are acceptable by everyone (all personality types). Strong because they are guided by their inner feelings. They try to achieve harmony so they try to do thing that are accepted by their community.

For me, being accepted by the community is becoming less satisfactory because my feelings can't be tuned down anymore. I felt that being true to myself is more important now. Thus I feel this is a strength, the ability to understand and control feelings to match the society’s expectations/needs.

I feel ESFP will receive attention when they do 'abnormal' things. They thus are seen as 'seeking attention'. For me, I have never tried to seek attention but people just notice me. I do not think a great deal about this, partly because I am an Extrovert and partly because I generally focus more on sensing the surrounding than paying attention to what I feel about it.

ESFP will do 'mad' things only if they are comfortable enough with themselves to withstand 'oppositions'. I feel this is because of the great discomfort when facing different opinions. It takes a great effect to deal with 'bad feelings'.

From young, parental approval and peer pressure weighted heavily on my decisions. Though I do not always agree with the decisions or opinions of people, I feel that it is not necessary to oppose them. But bottling up my feelings make me unable to truly feel happy and connected with people, though I always appear happy and confident of all decisions I make. Sometimes I feel it is too much of a trouble to explain how I think to people because most do not think the way I do, nor will they truly appreciate the depth of the matter.

As a result, most of the time, it is easier to not think and just do what people wants. Over time, it makes me feel superficial and I just succumb to people’s wishes. (This may be the part where ESFP may be easily influenced. But I stress that the core (feelings) still exist. But it is hidden due to its nature.

Do I qualify myself as ESFP? Yes. Because now I understand why I have behaved the way I did. The signs (my actions) were of other particular types but the reasoning were always from an ESFP.

I am a ESFP!

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thQnk :)


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